If she’s pushing you away, seems distant, or spends all of her time away from you, then you can feel comfortable asking some questions. Your girlfriend will have other male friends – that doesn’t mean she’s giving you up. Try not to feel so threatened by other men.
Small crushes are perfectly normal, even in rock-solid relationships. If you try to uncover every one of them you won’t be dating her for long. [2] X Research source If you look hard at your life, you’ll realize that you appear to like other girls when you’re just being friendly. A jealous mind invents stories where there are none.
She is with you already. She’s your girlfriend! Unless she’s cheating on you, it doesn’t matter if she likes someone else temporarily as long as she still loves you.
Ask yourself seriously why you care if she likes someone else. If you’re terrified of losing her, then you should talk to her. If you’re blindly enraged at the thought, then you need to take a step back. If you can’t find a way to trust her, either because of past issues or because you can’t shake the idea that she’s into other guys, just break up.
To be clear, what you’re looking for here is a sudden, unexplained reluctance to be physically intimate in ways that you previously were. If you previously were having sex and it doesn’t seem to happen any more, this is a sign of a problem. However, if you’ve only kissed your girlfriend on the cheek, her unwillingness to have sex with you doesn’t mean she’s having feelings for someone else. People can take time to progress through the stages of physical intimacy — in fact, progressing too quickly to sex is one of the most comment complaints women have about the physical side of their relationship.
This advice isn’t just for cell phones — it’s also for other types of electronic gadgets people can use to communicate with each other. For instance, if your girlfriend keeps shutting her laptop or logging out of her social media profile every time you walk into the room, this can be cause for concern if it’s happening alongside some of the other warning signs in this article.
To help differentiate between normal schedule conflicts and “troublesome” ones, try this trick. When your girlfriend says that she won’t be able to hang out with you, try suggesting a different time. If she still says she can’t make it, wait for her to suggest an alternative. Usually, when people want to hang out with each other but they have a schedule conflict, they’ll volunteer a different time for hanging out. If your girlfriend seems content to let the matter go unresolved, however, this can be a sign that she doesn’t really want to hang out with you at all.
Obviously, this doesn’t mean that if your girlfriend can look you in the eyes, she’s telling the truth. Skilled (or particularly remorseless) liars can look their significant other in the eye without any problem. It also bears mentioning that some people who are shy or socially awkward can naturally have a hard time looking other people in the eye. [6] X Research source In addition, certain types of social disorders may cause this behavior.
For instance, let’s say that your girlfriend hated going to the beach with her boyfriend in the past, but now has spent the past two weekends with “some friends” at one of their beach houses. As her boyfriend, it’s reasonable for you to question this, especially if she pretends that she has always liked the beach.
It’s an especially worrisome sign if your girlfriend’s new look seems to be designed to be attention-seeking or provocative. For instance, someone known for her conservative style of dress is less likely to spontaneously start wearing bare midriffs and low-cut tops than someone without such a reputation.
If you think you’re being ignored, be sure to stay calm. Texting your girlfriend 100 times to get a response isn’t likely to go over well whether or not she’s spending her time with another guy. Remember that constantly trying to clamber for someone’s attention can make you appear unattractively desperate.
Showing open affection for someone else in a way that goes beyond friendly fake-flirting or harmless banter (e. g. , kissing, intimate dancing, etc. ) Ditching you to exclusively hang out with someone else in social situations. Showing contempt or making fun of you in a way that goes beyond good-natured teasing, especially when only around certain people. Openly attempting to entice or arouse another person with innuendos or come-ons in a way that’s not intended as sarcastic or ironic.
This advice applies especially to you if you’re in a long-distance relationship. In an LDR, you don’t have the luxury of physical contact, so frequent communication is key to keeping your relationship healthy. Many relationship experts recommend trying to communicate in some minor way every day if you’re in an LDR.
“Nothing. " “Why do you want to know?” “I’ve just been really busy. " “I don’t want to talk about it. "
“How do you think we’re doing as a couple?” “Is there anything fun you’d like to do in the next couple of months?” “What sort of things do you think we can do to improve our relationship?” “What’s your favorite memory of us together?” “Where do you see us in a year?”
Note, however, that prolonged emotional distance can be a sign of many relationship problems besides infidelity. The National Healthy Marriage Resource Center pinpoints family and cultural differences, situational conflict, and stress as just a few of many alternate causes.
“Hey, who was that you were talking to on the phone?” “So, what did you do last weekend? “What are your plans for next Friday?” “How are your friends?” “Who have you seen recently?”
If your relationship gets to this point, sadly, it may be best to give your girlfriend what she wants. The pain of a quick breakup is usually much less than the pain of staying in an unhappy relationship with someone who actively wants to ruin it.
Gifts for any occasion (especially “just because”) Fancy nights out Gourmet meals Surprise appearances at work Clearing your schedule “just for her”
Of course, affection is usually a good thing within the context of a relationship, so don’t be suspicious of ordinary, reasonable affection. Getting lots of kisses and a fancy dinner after getting graduating or getting promoted is fantastic, but receiving the same outcome after asking where your girlfriend has been for the past week should be troubling.
